Liminal Space

September 10, 2026

Great and weird: that is how it feels to be retired. There is nothing bad about retirement, but it feels unfamiliar and the lack of a fixed routine is a bit unsettling.  I have found meaningful volunteer work, I am starting to explore new exercise classes, and I am spending time writing and reading like I have always yearned to do. The pace is gentler, maybe even gentler than I expected, especially since Nick returned to work 3 weeks ago.

Some days I am busy with yardwork or social activities with friends. I have had some delightful lunches out with former students and colleagues recently. Working around their schedules with the start of school and full-time jobs has pushed many of the get togethers to weekends. Slowly, I am noticing which of my neighbors are home during the day and have time to chat over the fence or when we see each other on walks. I am seeking out retired friends for coffee on weekdays or for an occasional outing.

The truth is that I am a great introvert. I can easily amuse myself with things at home for hours on end. But, by the middle of the day, I do want to have a conversation with someone other than my 3 cats. The cats especially love having me at home! We have time for morning snuggles and Carlos loves to join me in the hammock in the afternoon if I take a reading break.

An old friend of mine posted on Facebook last week that turning 60 felt like he was stuck in a liminal space and he was unsettled about where the changes would lead him. I pondered his message and can relate to his sentiments. My birthday is still a couple of months away, but 60 is a big milestone.  I am ready to welcome the next decade. I hope to embrace it with grace and enthusiasm for the new projects and activities I now have time to enjoy.

My retired friends tell me that I will find a new routine and my time will soon fill. Many have cautioned me to limit my commitments and build in blocks of time for fun. I think I have been judicious with my newfound time. I tutor two times a week, am running a support group once a month and in October I will begin to substitute a bit for the county that used to be my employer. That feels like plenty of responsibility and commitment.

In general, I am getting much more sleep and exercise in retirement. I have read 8 books since June 1 and I have been dedicating time to my larger writing project at least 3 days a week. All going well, I should have another draft to my editor before Thanksgiving. I am not idle by any means, but I am not rushing around the way I did in my parenting/working full-time and volunteering years.

As the days begin to shorten and the first cooler nights arrive, I intend to eagerly accept the change of season literally and figuratively. I am excited to see what comes next. And I will sit with the mild discomfort in the liminal space. I do not need to rush from task to task or fill every minute of my time. Slowing down to enjoy the autumn is all part of the process!